The Color of September::just be helpful, graceful and full of cheer...

{Introduction - you are welcome to use my living in yellow list, but please know that I wrote it for me. I share a few truths and thoughts not that I think you need them, but that I need them, and writing about them helps me do just that. Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6}

With September coming to a close and October on the horizon, I'm bringing the series to a conclusion with brief thoughts on the last three goals in my living in yellow list of priorities. 

Look for ways to be helpful.

In a message to women a couple of years ago, Andrée Seu Peterson made a comment that spoke directly to me:

You don't have to win the Pulitzer Prize, just be helpful....

Similar to be available, being helpful paints a broader stroke. It applies to my speech, my writing, my photography, my ministry and most certainly to my relationships, and for me - an air-head who can be too much Mary and not enough Martha - it means being intentionally helpful. 

Extend truck loads of grace to everyone.

I'm probably forgiving to a fault, but I honestly try to understand and excuse the behavior of others, because I'm well aware of the forgiveness and grace that has been extended to me - and the longer I live and the Holy Spirit uncovers my sins, the more I realize just how much grace that is - and how dare I withhold it from others. 

Approach each day with joyful laughter.

Proverbs 17.22 is one of my favorite scriptures...

A joyful heart is good medicine,

but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

My mother lived with the pain of rheumatoid arthritis for most of her adult life. Her legacy to me in that was that she did so with much grace and humor. She would often remind me that growing older isn't for sissies, but she said so with a chuckle and always made light of her disabilities. 

By the time I cared for her in our home, her memory had faded and her disabilities were many, but her ability to laugh at herself and others remained.

I remember trying to dress her before I figured out that she needed special clothing. I'd get one arm into a shirt sleeve, but not the other, and we'd both laugh at our predicament. 

Even those years ago, it was painful and difficult for me to turn or reposition her in her bed, and mother would laugh at my groans. So  would I, and the laughter was always good medicine for us both. 

{gently edited from here}

When I first memorized that verse it was in the KJV...

A merry heart doeth good like a medicine:

but a broken spirit drieth the bones.

Over ten years after my mother's passing and living with the same disability that threatened to steal my mother's joy, I'm determined to not complain, but to approach each day with the merry heart that's good like a medicine.

The Color of September::to encourage...

{Introduction - Although you are welcome to use my living in yellow list, please know that I wrote it for me. I share a few truths and thoughts not that I think you need them, but that I need them, and writing about them helps me do just that. Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5}

Therefore encourage one another  and build one another up,  just as you are doing.  ~ 1 Thessalonians 5:11 ESV
Focus on Encouraging Others 

The definition of encourage is to inspire with courage, spirit, or confidence. An encourager gives us the words and tools to be courageous, passionate and confident where ever we are in life and in our calling. 

Sometimes encouragement is approval, but it can also be the correction we need in our perspective or behavior. Whatever encouragement is, we all need it, and though scripture is our greatest source, scripture also exhorts us to encourage one another. 

When I wrote this list of goals a year ago, this one was initially: Focus on Encouraging others - Especially Younger Women, but as I've mingled more with women of all ages online, my perspective has changed a bit. I need to encourage all women - younger and older, because sometimes older women need the most encouragement of all - to feel needed and fulfill their purposes and to continue to grow and learn and live the life we've been called to. 

Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior,  not slanderers or slaves to much wine.  They are to teach what is good,  and so train the young women to love their husbands and children,  to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind,  and submissive to their own husbands,  that the word of God may not be reviled.  ~ Titus 2:3-5 ESV

It's been my life experience - as a young woman and a not-so-young woman - that most of us tend to seek advice and encouragement from women our age.

To segregate into age groups or stage-in-life groups is a natural tendency. Most of us have been doing that all of our lives - from kindergarten to marriage. We naturally and rightfully enjoy the fellowship of link-minded women our age - with common interests and situations in life - and it's good, but when we remain in age and lifestyle segregated groups {both on- and off-line}, the younger women pass up good-as-gold wisdom and encouragement, and older women begin to lose touch with the younger generations and the complexities of a rapidly changing society, and they begin to feel useless and unwanted.

My observation is that the combination of younger women who are teachable and godly older women who are willing to open their hearts gave us the privilege of obeying the Titus mandate.

~ Susan Hunt, Spiritual Mothering

The point is - we need each other - teachable younger women and willing older women - to encourage and fulfill our purposes in the body of Christ.

I'd love to hear from you - are you teachable and willing, and where do you see mutually encouraging relationships between younger and older women or where do you see it is lacking - online or off?    

The Color of September::hidden art, mistakes and failures...

{Introduction - Although you are welcome to use my living in yellow list, please know that I wrote it for me. I share a few truths and thoughts not that I think you need them, but that I need them, and writing about them helps me do just that. Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4}

Only three weekdays left in September and six priorities remain on my list, and if you were to walk into my house this week, you'd likely wonder how serious I am about half of them. It's the way life seems to unfold for me these days.  

I'm probably not remembering correctly, but I think my days were more predictable when all the spaces were filled, and as mundane as the daily tasks may have been, they moved me along in an orderly fashion.

But predictable isn't my goal, so I go with the flow - a consequence of being available on one hand and chronic illness on the other. It doesn't change my priorities - just reminds me that I'm not in control, keeps me humble and prevents perfectionism from taking root.

So I seize this late-night, early-morning moment - a temporary lull - to begin wrapping up my September thoughts before it's time to turn the page.

 

Nurture "hidden art"and Create and Share Beauty

For most of my thirty-six year marriage {next month}, Edith Schaeffer's The Hidden Art of Homemaking {originally published in 1971} has been my go-to source for inspiration at home. As defined by Schaeffer, hidden art is the art that is created in our every day lives outside our careers and professions, and includes everything from how we decorate our homes to the food we prepare and serve and the way we entertain ourselves and others. 

Not only is "hidden art" a reflection of our individual and unique personalities, it also reflects our worldview. That doesn't mean that our homes must look like churches or be filled with Christian images, but we are image-bearers and that as much as we have the resources to do so, the care we take to create order and beauty and share it with others can be a reflection of God's character in and to the world around us.

Humbly share what I've learned - especially my mistakes and failures

There's no shortage of Scripture to remind me of what God thinks of the proud. It's not self-deprecation for me to take little credit for whatever gifting God has allowed me to enjoy - I'd rather avoid His discipline than take credit for any of it. So I don't mind telling you that I'm not all that and a bag of chips and where I've made mistakes - where love has covered a multitude of my sins, and grace and mercy have been and remain abundant beyond measure.

That doesn't mean that I don't stand tall on who I know I am in Christ or that I don't have strong beliefs and therefore tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine {Eph. 4.14}. Come sit with me on my backyard swing and we'll talk doctrine and living as the esteemed, redeemed daughters of the King. Over tall glasses of iced tea or mugs of fresh-brewed coffee, you'll hear just how strong my beliefs are and how sure I am of God's sovereignty over all things, but I also know that those who have spoken truth into my life and have taught me how to love and live like Jesus have done so with humility, and they have encouraged me to grow by their willingness to be transparent, honest and vulnerable.

Write it or live it?

I'd intended to publish the next Color of September post this morning, but circumstances called on me to live it {being available means considering my agenda less important than the needs of others} rather than write about it. 

Isn't that the way it often happens? It's a testing of sort, I think. Not that I believe that God sent grief or hardship to someone else that I might respond, but maybe he prompted me to write about how I would respond when He knew what would be happening in the life of those I love.  

All I really know is that God is sovereign in the affairs of His creation and I don't need to try to explain it further. 

Don't forget the giveaway I wrote about yesterday. Several people have told me they are unable to leave a comment here. Would you do me a favor? If you are having a problem commenting, would you please drop me an email and let me know the problem you are having so I can work with Disqus to resolve it? 

{Photos: late September dawn on Pollywog Creek}

The Color of September::to be available...

{Introduction - Although you are welcome to use my living in yellow list, please know that I wrote it for me. I share a few truths and thoughts not that I think you need them, but that I need them, and writing about them helps me do just that. Part 1, Part 2, Part 3}

Another important element of giving is with our time. Most of us are so busy that the thought of adding one more thing to our weekly schedule is stressful. Instead of adding in another thing to our lives, perhaps God wants us to give Him all of our time and let Him direct it as He sees fit. ~ Francis Chan, Crazy Love

In an interview four years ago, I was asked how I spend my free time. Good question, I thought. I know that the person interviewing me wanted to know what hobbies or recreational activities I enjoy finding time for, but the words free time resonated and caused me to think deeper.

I've arrived at this stage in life where there are no little ones constantly under my feet or plates to keep spinning, and it's been decades since I worked outside the home. I haven't had this much free time since I was in kindergarten.

Even my chore list is simple these days, rarely requiring more than an hour of unscheduled time on any given day - unless I've chosen to tackle a particularly large and time-consuming task. The hours and minutes generally flow at an unhurried pace, and there's white space all over my calendar.

It's a gift, I know - but I wondered what free time really means for a Christian. Is any of my time really free - my own to use as I choose - when for to me to live is Christ...?  {Philippians 1:21 ESV} 

As I wrestle with that question in the light of scripture, the answer is obviously no - and in this living in yellow season, I flesh that out by simply being available - to wake up in the morning and ask God to order my steps and to remind me when interruptions occur that they are usually opportunities to love and live like Jesus that He has provided. 

To be available and let God use my time as He desires will look differently for all of us, but it doesn't mean I need to fill in those white spaces on the calendar and find busy work to fill the time {in fact, if I did that, I'd no longer be available}, but I'm reminding myself to approach each day expectantly, with the understanding that my time and abilities belong to the Lord, and if there is a need that I can meet, I'm available to be used to meet it.

What if we've confused our worth, our importance or significance with busyness, when who God is looking to use are those who will keep their calendars clear for Him? 

If you are still raising children, free time is not even in your vocabulary, but if you are in a season in which free time looks much like mine, what does being available look like in your life?

The Color of September::Content and Grateful...

{Introduction - Although you are welcome to use my living in yellow list, please know that I wrote it for me. I share a few truths and thoughts not that I think you need them, but that I need them, and writing about them helps me do just that. Part 1, Part 2 }

We buy a new home with inflation-high interest rates, and then I resign from a profitable career in nursing  - with a salary greater than my husband's and perks that include a car. It makes no sense, but we believe it's what God is calling us to do - for me to stay home with the three boys - so we step out on a limb and pray a storm won't bring it {and our little family} down.

It's obvious we need to make major changes in our spending habits, but what I don't know is that the more significant adjustments will be made in me - to remove self-centered and envious desires that had been taking root in a season of prosperity.  And it won't be easy.

Over twenty-five years later, the exact timeline of these events escapes me, but it wasn't long after I exchange my successful and satisfying career for stay-at-home-mothering that we also make huge changes in our giving habits - replacing a token offering with tithing our gross income.

That limb we stepped out on looked more vulnerable than ever, and as I try to reconcile the bank balance with our income, my lack of faith and contentment is revealed when I begin to consider not tithing so that we have more money for ourselves. 

It's not like we really need the money. It never works out on paper, but the limb doesn't break, no matter the storm. We pay our bills on time, and clothe and feed our family. Our healthcare needs are met. We have air-conditioning and a television, and I'm home with the children, but I'm not grateful and content - even with more than enough...and Louis insists we continue tithing. 

I don't remember how long I wrestle with this envy and heart-sickness, but I know that it was too long and miserable, and I remember confessing and asking God to please remove it and to give me a joy and contentment that could only come from Him...and when things aren't enough, grace is abundant, and in His kindness, He does indeed lead me to the contented, grateful life I long to live. 

I am wired by nature to love the same toys that the world loves. I start to fit in. I start to love what others love. I start to call earth "home." Before you know it, I am calling luxeries "needs" and using my money just the way unbelievers do. I begin to forget the war. I don't think much about people perishing. Missions and unreached people drop out of my mind. I stop dreaming about the triumphs of grace. I sink into a secular mind-set that looks first to what man can do, not what God can do. It is a terrible sickness. And I thank God for those who have forced me again and again toward a wartime mind-set.  ~ John Piper, Don't Waste Your Life

So why, in this season of life, though we have more disposable income than in those years we struggled, would I want to risk discontentment by changing our lifestyle to reflect that increase? The temptation certainly exists - to consider satisfying our desires for the same toys that the world loves. But I've been there, done that, and I've discovered the greater contentment of been satisfied in what the Lord provides {and sometimes it's one of those toys} and the joy of giving the increase away. 

And you? Have you ever experienced the misery of discontentment and envy?

The Color of September::Don't Stop Learning...

{Introduction - Although you are welcome to use my living in yellow list, please know that I wrote it for me. I share a few truths and thoughts not that I think you need them, but that I need them, and writing about them helps me do just that. Part I }

Though it wasn't my original intent, teaching my young children and supervising the studies of my older children for twenty-three years was an opportunity for me to continue my own education. In addition to relearning with a Christian worldview as I taught my children, I learned or re-learned a multitude of facts and acquired an appreciation for subjects, like history, that I did not enjoy during the years I was a student - when I was {sadly} more interested in popular music and boys than getting an education.   

Though my homeschooling years are over, they created in me a continual thirst for knowledge - enhanced today by my photography that has cultivated a sense of awe and wonder about things I'd never seen or cared about before capturing them in a photo. 

What is that plant? Is it native or invasive? Common or endangered? Poisonous, edible? What birds will eat the berries or come to my feeders? Does that insect sting or will he eat on my favorite flame bush? What makes the sunrise blaze orange? Why do the sweetgum trees turn yellow and red and "fall" in our 90-degree autumn? Just how close can I safely approach a gator? or bobcat? What butterfly or moth will emerge from that caterpillar's chrysalis?

Or the question that is the number one google search that brings  first time visitors to this blog: What do you feed a pollywog?

With the encouragement and inspiration of other photo artists, I'm challenged to grow in skill and knowledge that I pray is reflected in the quality of my photography - that it might bring glory to God - because it's not about me but how I can use the gifts and abilities God entrusts to me for the revealing of truth.

Therefore, my ongoing search for knowledge must come with the understanding that...

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge;

fools despise wisdom and instruction.

~ Proverbs 1:7

and it must be motivated by Jesus's answer to the Pharisee's question regarding the greatest commandment...

And he said to him,
“You shall love the Lord your God
with all your heart
and with all your soul
and with all your mind.

~ Matthew 22:37

One of the most effective ways I know to love the Lord with all my mind is to renew my mind and therefore change the way I live through the discipline of reading and studying His Word.

Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved,a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth. ~ 2 Timothy 2:15

Do you enjoy learning new things? Has God given you a gift that you are learning to improve that it might be used more effectively for His plans and purposes? Is the reading and studying of God's Word the foundation for all your learning?

{The Color of September series will resume on Monday}

The Color of September::It's not about me...

{Introduction - Although you are welcome to use my living in yellow list, please know that I wrote it for me. I share a few truths and thoughts not that I think you need them, but that I need them, and writing about them helps me do just that.}

Rick Warren's Purpose Driven Life has been a point of discussion and disagreement among Christians since its publication nearly a decade ago, and though I don't agree with him on every matter, he begins the first chapter by supporting my number one belief about how I'm to live this mist of a life I've been given.

It’s not about you. 

The purpose of your life is far greater than your own personal fulfillment, your peace of mind, or even your happiness. It’s far greater than your family, your career, or even your wildest dreams and ambitions. If you want to know why you were placed on this planet, you must begin with God. You were born by his purpose and for his purpose.

Whether or not I understood years ago that my life was hidden in Christ and that the purpose of my life was to glorify God and enjoy Him forever, the constant demands of raising and homeschooling children and caring for my bedridden mother in our home made it crystal clear that life was not about me. But I also thought that if I lived long enough, those demands would likely give way to the opportunity to be self-indulgent - free to go and do as I pleased, though I didn't give much thought to where I would go or what I would do.

Now that I'm here - how easy it would be in this season - my children grown with families of their own - for me to cater to selfish me and do just that - but  I know better. It's not the purpose for which I was created.

John Piper's Don't Waste Your Life has been a profound influence on shaping my beliefs about how I am to live this life hidden in Christ.  

We waste our lives when we do not pray and think and dream and plan and work toward magnifying God in all spheres of life. God created us for this: to live our lives in a way that makes him look more like the greatness and the beauty and the infinite worth that he really is. 

It goes back to what I wrote about being an image-bearer - to be who I am where ever God takes me today that I can pray and think and dream and plan  and work toward magnifying God - because it's not about me.

Every other living in yellow point must hinge on this one belief....I'll waste my time and my life if I try to make it about me. 

This past Sunday, Louis and I, along with the other life group leaders at our church, were asked to be available during both worship services. We attended the first service and then hung out in the coffee shop outside the sanctuary until we were needed during the second service. While we were in the coffee shop, a young man came in after leaving worship with his fussy baby. I considered offering to watch his baby so he could go back into the service, too, but he explained that it was his wife that usually had to leave with the baby and he wanted to do it for her this time. I thought that was a sweet gesture, so I let it go, and told him that I remember those days with babies and how discouraging it was for me to get all dressed up for church only to have to leave with a fussy baby. It's one of the reasons I think churches (thankfully ours is not one of them) that require young mothers to help out in the church nursery have it all wrong - it's an attitude that comes from the older women who think they did their time while they were young mothers and they now deserve to not be bothered. They may as well be saying, it's all about me.

When the baby's fussing turned into inconsolable crying that only a mother could soothe, the young man did let me hold his baby long enough for him to go back into the sanctuary to get his wife, but that was such a little thing. I love babies, but to be honest, I probably wouldn't have enjoyed watching that baby for the entire worship service. He was fussy and heavy and it was hard on me physically to hold and try to comfort him. I was happy to give him to his mother when she came in the coffee shop, but I also knew that I should be willing to watch him longer (anyone can do anything for just an hour, right?) if I'm going to live like it's not about me - because my strength to do anything when I'm weak doesn't point to me but to the Lord who gives me strength.

I'd love to hear your thoughts and hope you will share them here.

   

The Color of September::Introduction...

 
 

If you've been reading Pollywog Creek for a while, this post and photos will look familiar. It's the beginning of a series I began last September, and for reasons I no longer remember, I never finished. I've been a low energy, air-headed kind of girl all my life, and distractions {both good and bad} can easily derail me. When I get back on track, I often forget where I was originally going and just head off in the direction I'm led. I'm a typical sheep who desperately needs a shepherd. Gratefully, I have One, and true to his nature, he lets me start over. It's grace, y'all - pure grace. 
That said, I begin that series again - slightly edited to reflect this September. I do hope y'all will add to the discussions and feel free to call me back to it if I wander away again. Although you are welcome to use my living in yellow list, please know that I wrote it for me. I share a few truths and thoughts not that I think you need them, but that I need them, and writing about them helps me do just that.
After thirty-five years of marriage and twenty-three years of homeschooling {all by God's grace}, I live in a September season I could not have imagined as a younger woman. I don't remember what I expected my life would be like with married children and grandlittles, but I'm quite sure this wasn't it.  Last summer, in a quiet house and with time to reflect, I made a Living in Yellow list of ten points {in no particular order} I want to remember about life in this September season: 

1. It's not about me.
2. Don't stop learning.
3. Continue to live frugally - content and grateful.
4. Be available.
5. Nurture "hidden art", create and share beauty.
6. Humbly share what I've learned - especially my mistakes and failures.
7. Focus on encouraging others - particularly younger women.
8. Look for ways to be helpful.  
9. Extend truck loads of grace to everyone.
10. Approach each day with joyful laughter.

Lord willing and the creek don't rise - I'll expand on each of them further in the future. I'd be thrilled if you join me.

{Photos} Yellow last September in my Pollywog Creek backyard.